Day 83: Relationship Memory Reactions part 2 – “Is she cheating on me?” SF/SCS

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to a person I am close to that uses their phone to text when they are around me as backchat thoughts of “is she cheating on me?” which I realize is based in fear/assumptions and insecurities in my mind that I have not taken self-responsibility for in past relationships through self-correction. I realize that I have suppressed these reactions from past relationships which is proven by the fact that these reactions have just started coming up again as I spend more time with this one person. I am not willing to accept this separation of myself to continue as it is dishonest and I’m only willing to accept self-honesty as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to physically react through folding my arms which I realize clearly shows an attack/defence mechanism engaging within my mind, after participating with the thoughts of “is she cheating on me?”  And then try to pretend that I am not having thoughts through watching the film which is complete deception. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed fear to dictate my experience of myself when I am around this person and she is using her phone to text, when I see, realize and understand that disciplining myself through walking as breathe, remaining consistent in every moment is where I take responsibility for myself, where there is no fear experience whatsoever. 

I forgive myself that I have not realized that within fearing that this person will have sex with someone else and forget about me, that I am clearly showing I am existing as fear of loss, as allowing myself in a moment to be influenced by and exist as past relationship memory in complete separation of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing this person in my life, because of remembering how majority of every other relationships I have had in my life, It ended and I do not see the person at all now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my memory is valid, that my memory will “more than likely” play out to be true again, as if the relationship is dependent upon something else maintaining it, when in fact every relationship past, present and future is always the same, it is a fruit of my labour, it will blossom or deteriorate according to what I allow as myself. And I realize that if I allow an idea that it’s not worth trying because things will just play out the same, then any physical relationship would deteriorate from this bullshit principal. So within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that “things will just play out the same” removing my responsibility from the effective direction of the relationship, as if things “play out” according to something outside of my control, which I realize dooms every relationship before I start it because I’m already giving myself the excuse to quit. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give myself an immediate excuse to quit developing any relationship with a female through believing that past relationship memories will “prevail” as “things playing out the same with the relationship ending”. I realize that excuses are unacceptable, and that I am directly responsible for the deterioration or development of any relationship in my life, I am the directive principle, nothing else. So within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perpetuate and to be defined by past relationship memories of break ups. 

I forgive myself that I have not realized that within accepting and allowing myself to fear losing something/someone, I am already saying I am possessed by that something/someone, that I have created a mental relationship which requires immediate direction now to not allow any further accumulation which will be to the benefit of all.

I forgive myself that I have not realized as soon as this fear comes up as backchat thoughts in my head, that there is clearly shit that I have supressed from my last relationship which must be investigated and dealt with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define this fear that “she is cheating on me” to be real without any tangible, physical reason to accept this fear to be real, which is a complete state of illusion that I do not accept, because nothing is real that can’t be cross-referenced.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe even for a moment that through fearing her cheating on me I can stop it from happening, when in self honesty I can see that this is complete self-deception because in fact I cannot control what another person allows, if this person decides to sleep with someone else for whatever reason than that is what will happen, I realize I cannot change that in anyway , I cannot change what a person allows through fearing something in my mind as the mental does not move the physical. And I realize that through providing the point of her cheating on me with attention/energy in my mind through fearing it, I am much more likely to encourage it to happen through pushing the person away with unnecessary fear based assumptions. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust that assumptions in my mind when I’m around this person are real just because of creating a belief that a woman I am getting to know closely will inevitably want to get away from me, and will hide it from me rather than discuss it with me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear spending lots of time getting to know someone, to fear developing anything with one person, because of believing that ultimately in my mind it is going to be “pointless” because the person will “inevitably” see me as crazy, or react to some element of my life and then will gradually stop spending time with me. I realize that this is all just a fiasco happening in my head which requires immediate direction now, as fear does not support me in anyway in my life, so I commit myself to letting go of this belief/fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the word secret to the word phone in my mind in complete separation of myself, due to the amount of times in the past, where I have kept a secret from someone in a text format for work, or a friend, or in my last relationship where both me and my ex kept secrets from each other in texts. Thus when I see someone texting while they are around me and I am getting closer to them, I automatically think “phone/secret” which then leads to “I wonder if their phones have secrets they don’t want me to see”, which then leads to “is she cheating on me?”. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to through accumulating and charging the connection of phone and secret through the years in my mind, to automatically think a person I’m getting to know is keeping secrets from me while they are texting, without realizing that a phone is for communicating with people not for “keeping secrets” as I have defined in my mind, so I take responsibility to remove this concept that a phone is connected to secrets. I realize that secrets is a human accepted and allowed system which has nothing to do with phones, a phone is just a way a person can choose to store/share secrets through, but so is the internet, so is a diary, so there is no reason to connect phones to secrets and assume this person or any person is keeping secrets from me when they are texting.   

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be this persons centre of attention at all times, which I realize is like using a person as a crutch for the fact that I am insecure about the person, that I do not trust this person, that I fear losing the person, that I am wanting the person to constantly validate my trust of the person which is complete self-possession as ego. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look for validation of trust in another as ego through desiring to be the centre of the persons attention, competing in my mind to be the “winner of her total attention” in complete separation of myself. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a polarity in relation to this person’s attention, that it is “positive” when I am getting her total attention, and its “negative” when something else has her attention. When I realize that this is a statement of absolute bullshit and deception, because attention or not there is no “good” or “bad” that comes into it, and common sense nobody can only communicate with one person, to expect that is a complete god complex, where I define myself as god and am indirectly saying that I want her to be my “perfect slave follower” giving me her undivided attention at all times, so I can see that this is completely unacceptable, thus I take self-responsibility to stop this behaviour completely.  

I forgive myself that I have not realized in all moments that I am around this person I am close to, or around any person, is that trust is not something that someone else can give to me, it is that which I must walk as myself, because i realize that I cannot control another person, I cannot decide how, or what another person will do. I can only make sure that my starting point is clear as breathe, that I am existing as the directive principle of trust, that no matter what I live what’s best for all here as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a light form of jealousy towards her phone whenever she is texting on it, which manifested in this instance through me folding my arms and pretending I am just watching the film, which is stupid, because the moment I have a problem with something she is doing, I must not blame something else, or avoid discussion, I must just breathe and investigate/release that which I’m reacting to and is causing a friction in me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create self-beliefs that a woman I get to know closely will “obviously” find me to be “boring” and in general “not good enough”.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that the reason I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that this person will find me “boring” and “not good enough” is because I have created and defined myself in my mind as “boring and not good enough” which is completely unacceptable separation/definition of myself . 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am “too scary” to be in a relationship with a woman, because i have seen many times before where people I have gotten to know in the past have reacted in fear to something I have said, or something about my life and then stopped talking/interacting with me. When I realize that this concept that I am “too scary” for a partner is a completely self-limiting/disempowering concept which is thus totally unnecessary to participate within. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge and sabotage myself in my mind as something less than “relationship worthy” in my mind, when this is just happening in my mind according to my experiences/programming, and thus is not valid to accept as real. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Justify these beliefs in my mind that I am “boring” “weird” and in general “not good enough” is because of believing I do not adhere to a lifestyle that many women would like - I don’t go partying, I don’t wear fashionable clothes, I don’t have huge muscles, I don’t celebrate xmas/holidays, I spend a lot of time on the computer, and with my dogs/mum and son. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that any of these points validate self-definitions of me being “boring”, “weird” or “not good enough”, when in fact they do not, it is all created in my mind according to my idea of what a “normal man” does, which is not real and so must be stopped completely.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself as insecure when this person is texting on her phone as thoughts that  “she’s probably looking for a way out of talking to me”, when this is all happening in my head not in physical reality.

I forgive myself that I have not realized in all moments that no matter who I am around or what they are doing, that unless my starting point of myself is clear as breathe, then I am in complete separation of myself through accepting an illusion that pops into my head in any given moment as total instability shifting all over the place whenever things in my immediate environment change in some way, so I realize i must be stable as breathe in all environments with any person.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to participate with any backchat fear based thoughts of “is she cheating on me”, as I realize that participation with any backchat will always result in a separation inside myself, a separation from others, as backchat is composed in separation from physical reality, separate from who I really am as breathe.

I commit myself to not allowing fear to dictate how I experience myself around this person, as I realize that to accept fear as myself, is to accept the enslavement of myself and another to polarity frictions of the mind.

I commit myself to not allowing mental relationships in relation to this person to accumulate and control me as an unstable being, as I realize that this will result in a relationship of brainwashed self-interest, and I realize that in order for a relationship to be beneficial for all, I must stand as the point of physical stability through directing myself as breathe where I can make consistent common sense decisions/movements of physical support of myself and another without any mind shit getting in the way, causing frictions in the relationship.

I commit myself to not allowing relationship memories to dictate how I experience myself in a relationship that I develop now in my life.

I commit myself to exposing mental relationships in any physical relationship to always be completely unnecessary, unrealistic, damaging for both parties, and while mental relationships in this world are deemed to make a relationship “stronger” by many, in common sense very clearly that he more “positive” or “negative” mental values I create place about a person, does not make me physically closer to the person, it actually keeps me further away from the person, further from supporting the person unconditionally as myself, because I am placing so much more value on a mental painting about the person, becoming completely possessed by this picture that what is physically beneficial for the person is almost irrelevant, as long as we “feel the love” between each other then it doesn’t matter how we physically treat each other, which is how abuse is accepted in a relationship, and I’m not willing to accept that.

I commit myself to investigating, understanding and releasing all dimensions of relationship memory reactions that may occur with this person through self-honest introspection, and self-corrective application walking as breathe.

When and as I see this person using their phone, I stop and breathe; I do not allow myself to engage with any whisper backchat thoughts that may come into my head, as I realize that the consequence of this will not be to the benefit of all. It is best to focus on breathing, consistently until the reaction is here no further.

     

Day 82: Relationship Memory Reactions part 1 – “Is she cheating on me?” Assumptions/Insecurities

Ok so today I was sitting down with a person that I have been spending a lot of time with recently, wherein we have had sex multiple times and in general get on well. However I noticed when she was texting on her phone, that I had an internal reaction as backchat thoughts based in fear as an assuming, jealous, inadequacy which I really have not experienced since my last relationship which was over 3 years ago. And basically the context of the backchat was simply "is she cheating on me?".

So it’s like experiencing myself as not being good enough, as wanting to be this persons centre of attention completely without any distractions. So when I experienced this reaction, I had my arms folded and I was just watching a film pretending that I wasn’t bothered by her texting on her phone, when in fact in self-honesty, I realized in the same moment that I was reacting to her texting on her phone, and I can see that this is a pattern which I have not dealt with, which I developed years ago and does not assist and support me in aligning to and living what’s best for all.

Because I realize that when I am next to any person using their phone I should not be reacting, I should be stable as breathe without having any jealousy based thoughts coming up. And I can see that these thoughts I was having towards this person were all fear based, as I was worried that she was texting another guy because in my mind I “must be boring her” and I’m “not good enough” which had no substance in physical reality whatsoever because she was actually not texting any other males as my backchat assumed, and really the situation showed me that I have insecurities of trust with this person due to not trusting myself in totality, due to not dealing with these insecurities that I had in my last relationship, which just now showed themselves again.

I discussed this point with her as it happened and we had a cool chat about it, so what is evident to me is that this kind of behaviour is a dimension of my pre-programming that must be corrected so that I am stable in my starting point, where i may be able to develop a relationship with this person, because I have seen that mental relationships do not assist and support me or anyone else in this world in developing and living what is best for all. So join me in my next blog as I walk self-forgiveness/self-corrective statements on this point as well as continuing to investigate any other relationship reactions/patterns that may come up.

Day 81: “I want to be a Machine” Part 3

Machines are currently just an extension of the pre-programmed self-interested minds of humans, trying to play god, but through changing ourselves to live what’s best for all we can change our whole starting point in relation to machines so walk with me: 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as thoughts in my head of a desire to be a machine when I start judging/comparing myself as not as a good as a machine in a particular task. So within this I forgive myself that I have accepted ad allowed myself to judge myself and compare myself as being “less than” machines in a specific task. I see realize and understand that regardless of the fact that a machine might be more effective than me at many things, such as equating mathematical equations for one, however there is no need to be judging and comparing myself as “less than” a machine, as I realize that this is a completely disempowering self-sabotaging concept which does not assist me in anyway in supporting life equally, and is not actually real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a self-belief that I am stupid and machines are smart.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as these desire to be a machine based thoughts that come up at times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear living in a world without machines to do things for me, a car to drive around in, a TV to watch, a phone to use, internet etc. when really I did not come into this world with this fear, and if all technology disappeared from this world tomorrow, then who I am as breathe would not change at all, so there is no need to fear something which is only in my head, and I realize that all machines that I enjoy using will be taken at death, so its best that I let go of all value I have placed in machines now as its common sense best for all, and also assists in preparation for inevitable death.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that over 3 billion people in this world get by without technology, so there is no need to fear having no technology, because it is a reality for so many people in this world. And if I had never had technology before, then I would not have developed any fears of losing any technology, which clearly shows that the fear is not real, like all fears.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sometimes experience jealousy towards machines when I see how quickly and effective a machine is at calculating mathematical equations, when this is ridiculous because the calculator only is adhering to its programming, and it actually assists me in being able to get mathematical tasks complete, so experiencing jealousy towards machines is stupid.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify desiring to be a machine in my head when I see how effective machines are in their detail to specificity, when I realize that this is not a valid justification as there is no valid justifications that exist in desiring to be a machine, so it must be stopped now.

I forgive myself that I have not realized in all moments of breathe that a desire to be a machine is not actually coming from me as a life, it is simply a pre-program running that I have accepted and allowed as myself through participating with thoughts of desiring to be a machine, so within this is I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate with and as desire based thoughts of desiring to be a machine as a pre-program.

I forgive myself that I have not realized in every breathe that as long as I participate with and as any pre-programmed thoughts in my head, then I am already proving I am a machine, not a machine of metal, but a machine of flesh and bone possessed, controlled and enslaved within and as consciousness time loop patterns which must be stopped, because i realize that as long as I allow myself to be controlled by robotic consciousness, then I am not able to live and do what’s best for all in any moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look for an easy route out when I accept and allow myself to judge/compare myself as “not good enough”, which is where I use the machine to give me the easiest route possible, rather than even attempting it myself, so that I can do less physical labour and I can make the machine do the labour for me in self-interest, which is unacceptable, because enjoyment of labour in all moments is vital because I must do physical labour to get things done in this reality, machines can assist me with physical labour, but expecting machines or anyone to do labour for me without even trying myself is unacceptable as it feeds into the whole concept of god and slaves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feed into the whole concept of slaves and gods through trying to find ways to get machines to do labour for me without even attempting to do it myself. I realize that all humans here have to do labour, it is a requirement for building heaven on earth, getting our hands dirty and building a new world stone by stone, this is not to say that machines cant assist us, but doing all the physical labour work for us is unacceptable.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that within relying on machines to everything for me, that I am directly feeding into procrastination within and as my mind which is not acceptable.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that the more I and all humans rely on machines to “do things for us” when we are rushing, or annoyed, judging ourselves just stuck in the mind in some way, that we are literally saying that physical labour is a machines work not a humans, our work is to feed our mind with entertainment, which I realize is where a polarity judgement towards physical labour can occur. So within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to charge physical labour with a negative polarity, and to charge entertainment of my mind with a positive polarity as there is no positive or negative that exists in physical reality, there is only what’s best for all and what’s best for some.  And I realize that it is from this polarity judgement which there is thoughts that come up to desire to be a machine or have a machine do the physical labour for me in complete separation of myself.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that by placing a polarity on physical labour and mind entertainment as “good” and “bad”, that I am unconsciously charging all other mind consciousness systems in this world to do the same, and thus continue feeding this delusional idea that much of humanity has currently which is that using machines is a “saviour”. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize in all moments that using machines is not the problem, it is my starting point within using the machine, if there is any mental relationships to any piece of machinery, then I must slow down within and as breathe as a stable starting point, investigating, correcting, taking self-responsibility for myself before i use the machine.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that humans are limited within and as flesh and bone bodies, and that it is thus justified to desire to be a machine, when in fact it is through living equal and one as our flesh and bone bodies that we can truly express, enjoy and expand ourselves in this world, rather than through the machinations of the mind where shit like this machine desire comes from. And I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is any justification that exists for desiring to be a machine, when in fact all justifications are equal as justifications and are not valid in self-honesty as what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief that it is possible for humans to get rid of thoughts feelings and emotions through becoming machines, which although this may be possible, this would literally mean the end of humanity, and also is not actually dealing with our thoughts effectively through taking responsibility for ourselves, but is actually a form of hiding.

I forgive myself that I have not realized in all moments that desiring to become a machine to end all thoughts, feelings and emotions is not effectively dealing with the problem, it is running away into a machine matrix so to speak at the expense of humanity which is not acceptable.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that machines are limited to their programming just like humans, so we are actually the same, and require for all humans and machines to be programmed in a way to support life equally on earth, so machines and humans can live in harmony, so I take self-responsibility for this.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to perpetuate a world where machines are used to place more people into unemployment and expand the profits of company owners through introduction of things like self-service tills at supermarkets, unmanned oil rigs etc. I realize that in an equal money system, there will be more than enough jobs to go around to keep everyone in employment while utilizing machines in whatever field is necessary and practical, and obviously there will be no company owner fat cats that will be able to profit off of firing humans to get machine workers.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as a capitalist where through participating in this money system I support the creation of masses and masses of shit products made by machines for a few to profit. I realize that in a world that’s best for all, there will only be the best of everything made, so shit products will cease to exist which will save the limited resources of mother earth rather than wasting majority of them as we are doing now.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in a system that allows for Trillionaire businesses/investors/bankers/royal groups to use machine programs to manipulate financial markets for their own financial profit at the expense of the majority. I realize that in an equal money system, financial trading for profiting over others will not be allowed and so will cease to exist, and thus so will the creation and usage of computer programs designed to finically cripple people cease to exist.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blindly accept a system growing up in this world that allows for the media industry and various groups to literally idolize machines as “the new god to be praised”. In a world that’s best for all it is clearly understood that machines are not to be praised, that mental relationships with machines is dangerous, is asking for the destruction of man, and that machines must simply be a life support tool programmed to assist humans in programming ourselves in assisting and nurturing all life equally on earth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in a system that allows for billions and billions to be wasted every year on development of new “life extending/time travelling/free energy” technology for the minority to use while billions of people starve. In a world that’s best for all we do not create any technology until all humans on earth are fed, clothed, housed and educated to an equal standard so that we can all make the most of any technological advancements together with nobody left behind out of the equation in destitute poverty. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a system that allows billions and billions every year to be wasted on the creation and implementation of machines of war such as predator drones. I realize that a world that’s best for all has no attention paid whatsoever on any military machines of war being created, as these machines can only be abused in abusing life and so must be stopped production worldwide immediately. In a world that’s best for all the military will become de-weaponized and purely be about physical labour support.  

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to allow films/music and media like Terminator, Robocop, Matrix, Spineshank, Fear Factory to charge this desire to be a machine that has accumulated in my life.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that in a way one could say that humanity actually does require to become like terminator, not actually replacing our flesh and bone with machine parts, but to re-program ourselves to walk as unconditional dedication to complete a mission like the terminator, an unbreakable will in every moment to support life equally as ourselves and through the political implementation of an equal money system. All humans living in equality on earth, no fear of survival, no limitations on education, all beings able to expand understanding of ourselves, re-programming ourselves to support life, expressing ourselves and enjoying ourselves more on earth – that is mission complete. 

I commit myself to not allowing myself to participate with any desire based thoughts of wanting to be a machine, as i realize that these thoughts are not my own as life, but are simply illusionary pre-programmed backchats in my head which are not real and so I do not participate.

I commit myself to stopping all judgements/comparisons of myself as being “less than a machine” in my mind when I react to a particular task I am doing. I realize that I can only do what I can do breathe by breathe, and while a machine may be able to do more, this is no reason to judge myself in anyway because this fiasco is not real; it is only in my head.

I commit myself to not looking for machines to do things for me if I am perfectly able to get it done myself, as I realize that expecting machines to do everything for me, feeds into procrastination and the general developing idea in society that machines should just do “everything for us”, which would obviously then be enslaving ourselves to our creations, just like we do in our mind, enslaving ourselves to pre-programmed creations. This must be stopped.  

I commit myself to not fearing losing machines that I use daily in my life, because I realize that this fear is not real, I realize that I did not have this fear when I was born here, I learned it. I realize that every machine I use daily I will lose at death so it’s definitely best to remove all value I place in machines now. I also realize that billions of people in this world still do not have access to the type of machines I use daily, so there is no reason to fear losing something that is not being equally shared anyway, and I realize that if I never used the machines I use daily before, then I would already have no fear of losing it because i never would have had it, as so many people in this world don’t.   

I commit myself to not allowing jealousy towards machines to exist as I realize that this jealousy is based in comparison which is competition, which is separation which is unacceptable, so I stop.  

I commit myself to not allowing myself to see machines as “more advanced” then humans when I realize that we humans already exist as robots through our enslavement to thoughts, feelings and emotions. So I realize that neither humans or machines are better than each other, there is no competition that exists other than in our heads, we are both equally here subject to our programming, and thus we require to re-program all humans and machine sin this world to support life equally.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to believe that I can stop all thoughts, feelings and emotions for good through becoming a machine, which I realize is not actually dealing with the problem through self-investigation, and self-honest self-corrective application, it is literally running into the matrix to be my saviour, to change me for me, which is not acceptable, as all real change must originate from me here as breathe, not through looking for something else to change me for me, that is self-deception. 

 

I commit myself to not allowing any justifications of desiring to be a machine to exist within and as me, as I realize that a desire to be a machine is not really me as life, but is simply a pre-program that I have accepted and so now I commit myself to stop this blind acceptance.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to create polarities in relation to physical labour and the entertainment of my mind, which is where I realize I fabricate justifications of using machines to do hard work for me so I can swim around in my mind all day, which I do not accept as it is abusive to life.

I commit myself to exposing anything in this world which claims that machines are saviours in anyway as complete bullshit, because only we humans can be the change that this world requires through first living what’s best for all as ourselves in all moments, then through implementing an equally money system politically to ensure a dignified life for all from birth till death.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to react to any media which sensationalizes and focuses on selling machines as some kind of saviour, as I realize that allowing this kind of media to affect me just charges the desire to be a machine and have machines do everything for me which is complete unacceptable self-deception, as we humans are clearly the problem on planet earth, so we humans must equally be the solution then, not machines.  

I commit myself to creating a world as myself where machines are not used an extension of the abusive programming of man, but are instead used only as a means to assist in the facilitation of supporting and nurturing all life on earth equally.

When and as I see myself experiencing any thoughts, feelings or emotions based in a desire to be a machine, I stop and breathe. I do not allow myself to participate within and as these reactions as I realize that to do so would mean the further enslavement of myself as organic machine of consciousness, which I do not accept, I only accept self-honesty for myself, on the walking out of the machine mind into and as physical reality equal and one.