Day 250: The excitement of new boundaries to eclipse - part 2 - Maximising my living potential

Always there are new horizons, new expansions to our learning capacity, new limitations that must be stood equal to and removed, then through removing these limitations I increase and maximise my potential in anything that I do.

Nothing is more exciting in life then the fruits that come from transcending a previously held definition, or point of separation, a pre-program that was slowing me down, isolating and abusing me and everyone around me within and as the ego.

This is the rewards of Self-honesty, it is the enjoyment, the stability and state of bliss that occur from a consistent commitment to beneficial change, the physical elasticity and free flowing of movement that comes from consistently not allowing the pre-programmed mind to determine our decision making.

Nothing is more beautiful in life then showing ourselves that we are stronger then we ever imagined, so much stronger then the egotistical chatter in our heads would suggest-

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear changing where I live, I realise that this fear comes from defining myself according to the previous place I was living as if I am removing a piece of myself if I move.Yet within this I have seen how stupid this fear is since I have completed a move recently - what did I notice? I realised and saw that am still breathing, that I have not lost any part of me as imagined in my ego prior to the move, because it makes no difference what house I am living in, any house that can provide.

I forgive myself that I have not realised in every here moment of breathe that fear always paints a grim picture in my mind to deceive me, that I will "not be able to breathe" without this or that - how will I manage without this or that? Etc. When I stand as Self-honesty here, it always shows me that these ideas from the fear based ego are not true.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I would lose a part of myself through moving house, because as I have seen this fear was false, and was simply something my ego was throwing up as a defence mechanism to not move - I always notice that with fear, it keeps me stuck, not moving while time is moving fear keeps us unmoving like statues in a world where physical movement is needed to get things done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as someone who always must live with animals, because while I have multiple hotel stays in different countries on my own at different points, I have only ever actually lived with animals with a family member or friends at any point in my life. I realise this definition only serves to limit me and does not assist me in living what is best for all life, so I walk to remove this self-definition from my life and align my resonance to a new expansion of my living capacity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt if I am capable of living completely on my own in my own house for a prolonged period of time -  It is only me and my plant in a large house, and even then I have noticed my ego trying to almost desperately call out to various different people to "join me" from this fear based doubt of my capability to keep on top of looking after this whole house by myself continually and not having any animals or humans in my home.

I realise that I am capable of living on my own just the same as living with other people, I am not more or less regardless of this - however within this building comfortability of being on my own daily in my living space, I of course must be aware and careful that I do not allow a pre-program of Isolation and Self -Isolation to start trapping me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate with desperate thoughts at times since I have moved, to get random people to come round my house - I realise that interacting with people is cool and always important to getting things done more effectively because two hands are always better then one, but doing so from a starting point of desperation in relation to my living accommodation trying to fill a void of silence in my house, a silence that I have reacted to and is actually nothing but separation which is thus not real and thus is pointless to accept within myself.

I forgive myself that I have not realised in every moment of breathe that It is within living what is best for all life, that one creates multiple beneficial interactions and effective new relationships in life - yet living what is best for all is never done form a starting point of desperation, which is always self-interest. For instance I started leaving food out for birds from the first day I moved in, as an action that supports all life and now there are already new bird friends who are coming to say hello to me everyday :) so I take self-responsibility to make sure that I do not participate with any thoughts based in desperation to have company, but rather create company from actions that show all life that I can be trusted with life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to the silence of living on your own, because while I have never had a problem living on my own for a week or two in this hotel or that persons house etc - I have now been on my own in my new property for over two weeks now, and I have noticed my mind having backchat about the silence of not hearing other people speak in my house, no animal noises.

I realise that this reaction to the silence does not assist me at all, because silence is what it is, and assists me in  many ways to focus on what I'm doing, which perhaps is why my ego has been reacting to the silence, because silence afford us the opportunity to slow down and look at exactly what we are doing within ourselves and our surroundings.

So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to manipulate myself as the ego, to try and create noise, the bustle of people in my new home as a means of trying to avoid effective introspection, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application of breathing. 

I forgive myself that I have not realised in every moment that there are no limits on my living accommodation other then I what I allow to be imposed in my mind - because ultimately if a property gives me a roof over my head and allows me to live in dignity then that is all that matter with anywhere I find myself anywhere in this physical existence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to limit my own potential through feeding into this fear of changing living accommodation - I realise that I must be continually stable as breathe regarding the property I live at, which enables me to maximise my common sense decision making and thus increase my ability to live in a wider variety of scenarios.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to not allowing myself to participate I within nay fear based thoughts with regards to living in my new home, I realise that these thoughts only serve to strengthen the ego, limiting my own potential and keeping in a cycle of separation, so as and when I see my mind having fears about living in my new home, I stop and breathe, this is where I bring myself back here, keep myself aligned to physical reality where I can apply common sense, learn effectively and maximise my living potential.

I commit myself to living the realisation that no matter where I find myself on this planet, if I am with people, with animals, with people and animals or on my own, I am no more diminished or enhanced in any scenario, I am me as this breathe of life as my specific resonant signature - so as long as a building gives me a roof over my head and a life of dignity, then I have everything I need to live a life that is best for all.

Day 249: The excitement of new boudaries to eclipse

It is one of the most exciting things to achieve, because while it can be difficult and uncomfortable for us to make certain changes in our life - once we are committed, we stick to our aim and when you stand at the point of transcendence of a limitation  you previously had installed in your life it is the most exciting thing one can experience.

Because in my experience it is in these moments where I am self-honest, where I test myself, push myself, shock myself, that is when i realise that I am stronger then I imagined, that harmonical change really is possible in my inner and outer world, in my day to day life, because I have just shown myself in my actions that there are no limitations other then what I make for myself.

This realisation makes me confident about my own and humanities collective potential to build a world that truly is actually best for all life here, right here on our one planet, a reality of beauty and dignity forged with our hands - not in the deceptive, selfish and imaginary realms of the pre-programmed hereafter.

Yet as I mentioned at the top there is always uncomfortability manifested as fear that comes with the initial decision to make changes to anything in our life, and then there is more fear at the physical uncomfortability that I will have to endure to make the necessary beneficial change to my conduct.

Then there is more fear about whether or not I can maintain the change that I have endured and created, and of course within this the only way to know in my experience is how well I am breathing, how self-honest am I actually being? Are there still thoughts coming up all the time? Because if they are then I always know there is much more investigation and work to do.

I know when there are still thoughts with regards to any point of change and when there are a reduction of thoughts and when there are truly none -

when there are none that continue to come up then I know I have been effective, that my transcendence of the limitation is complete.

That is not to say that the point of limitation will not come up again in the future at some point, but even if it does, it will have no control over me, I will be able to immediately align myself here, so then I will be able to interact with the point without any fresh addictions, desires and fears coming up.

I have pushed myself a lot in recent weeks with regards to living in a new house, building a new home which is always a beautiful analogy for what self-directed change is all about - building stronger, more stable houses within ourselves.

There have been fears though, which I must walk out to make sure that I maximise my potential within living in my new home - so join me next week as I continue on my journey to life.
    

Day 248: What happens when we die?

It's a question that has been existent within all humanity for a long time, a pre-programmed pattern of thought, where we all wonder - what will happen when I die? Some one asked me this just last night, what I believe happens when we die.

It is a fact that we all will die, and there are of course the main religions, each with their own perspective, yet there is thousands of different ideologies around the world, from thousands of different cultures and groups. What does this huge variety of options suggest from a starting point of common sense? It means that a lot of people are going to be disappointed, because surely not every ideology is correct right?

It tends to be fear of the afterlife that makes us as humans cling onto whatever concept we believe fits our personality, whatever concept we believe will keep us "the safest" in the afterlife, give us the best outcome.

People see the horrors in this world like wars, rape, starvation, the abuse of anything natural and innocent - these things cause us to become afraid, to want to escape, to get to "somewhere better" then here.

The hope being of course that in the afterlife will be a paradise existence, much better then whats here, when in reality it is this hopeless pursuit of happiness in self-interest which is the reason why the suffering occurs in this world - the majority still do not want to take self-responsibility to fix the issues in the world, but rather just hope for something better here after, and so the cycle of abuse continues in this world. 

Yet one thing my granddad taught me growing up with regards to any religious ideas of the afterlife is this - Marley if I cannot quantify something, if I cannot measure it here, then there is no way I can claim to you to know what something is, which is why each religion is confused because they are all claiming that they can quantify the afterlife, as if they have already been there and been able to bring back their findings, which in reality is not the case.

So within this is where my Scientific Atheistic personality developed - also as my questioning mind continue to question the afterlife growing up, this lead me to more research, more cross referencing and some things have clearly become certain about religions and death -

1. The more you research the history of religion, the more you realise that today's religions are essentially new religions created for profit for a few/propaganda/slavery and the continuation of a pyramid like system as capitalism. Yet in the scope of human history on Earth and the further you go back cross referencing the stones of the earth, then the oldest religions on this planet paint a far different story then what the main religions say, because the further you go back tens of thousands of years before the words Christian, Jew, Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist or Hindu were uttered by humans, then the more you find Reptilians and a whole host of various beings from various places, some of which seem to have also been trying to find God, the meaning of life and death, and in some cases turning themselves into Gods over humans and other beings in hieroglyphs and scripture.
2. One thing for certain is you will not be taking your earthly physical possessions with you, this is perhaps one of the most commonly agreed upon factors of death, and in fact it is this fear of losing possessions, fear of repentance, fear of death that has been the catalyst of a lot of scientific research into Immortality.
   
3. Breathe - our physical breathe is encapsulated in our physical body, and on the day we die everyone knows that breathe stops in the physical body - so one could say that our breathe is not our own then, but rather a natural life force of Earth that is our balancing weight for our time in this physical world.
4. If your mind is encapsulated in your physical brain, then surely you cannot take your personality with you, so it seems certain that after the physical death that there is some kind of "second death" of everything about our character in this lifetime that occurs.

There are of course other things that are not certain - variables which various people have shared with me through the years: a tunnel of light, seeing your life flash before your eyes, perhaps having to explain yourself to Mother Earth, seeing your life replayed and having to take self-responsibility for the abuse that you incurred in your lifetime as a form of cosmic karma -

perhaps these life memories will be stored in some kind of records, then perhaps I will be reborn into the physical body of a baby, and I will have to attempt to relearn to stop the mistakes from a previous life. Some say there is different beings that you will see, Reptilians and the like perhaps.

Yet in reality outside of the 4 things I mentioned there is nothing else that I or anyone else can prove
to be fact about religion and the afterlife - so I suggest do not waste time on thinking about the afterlife.

Through the years I have installed a new system within myself to develop stability, whereby I commit

myself to not allowing myself to participate with random thoughts about the afterlife, so when questions and thoughts come up about the afterlife, I stop and breathe, I do not allow myself to go into these thoughts, because in reality all that happens is the separation of myself here, wasting hours of time, wasting so many moments of breathe sitting there "wondering and researching" that which cannot be quantified, when there is work to be done in this world here, to make myself as this world a better place, which is the optimum point of importance.

I do not want to leave a world of shit for my children and their children to have to fix, I take self-responsibility here, to live a life of self-honesty, redesigning myself and the world around me to that which supports all life equally.

Never allow yourself to give up on life, to give up on building a better world here - because if we cant get it right here, don't expect it to magically go right in the afterlife.
 

    

Day 247: Is it down to the muscle? Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself into believing that I am an expert in something like building websites, when in actuality I am in the process of learning these skills yet I am not at the level of physical knowing, it is not down to the muscle, therefore I cannot proclaim or direct anyone from a solid platform.

I forgive myself that I have not realised in all moments of breathe that if I have not learned something down to the muscle, then there is holes in my understanding, meaning I have not yet fully integrated and learned the information therefore my understanding of application of this information is not yet aligned, meaning that deceiving myself or anyone else that I am a master in the field makes no sense.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to deceive others that I am an expert in building websites, when in reality this is something I have been busy learning yet I cannot speak from a position of authoritative absoluteness.

I realise that I cannot cheat the physical, because when it comes to crunch time, ultimately I can only actually speak, act and direct with complete clarity that which I have learnt down to the muscle - my speaking has no stutters, no thinking involved when I am an expert in something, when I am not then speaking, acting and directing is very rigid and difficult.

I forgive myself that I have fallen into a pattern of trying to wow others with my knowledge of technology, which really is only serving to show my own personal insecurities as my ego clutches for some kind of affirmation from another, that I am this idea of myself that I'm imaging and projecting onto them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react when someone brings up a conversation about technology, and without any consideration of what is happening in my mind, I can see when I look now that there is a shift that occurs, where this technology super-ego character steps forward and attempts to baffle this person with my amazing technological knowledge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as this expert in anything to do with technology, when really this definition does not support me, it keeps me in separation from psychical reality and is really just my ego trying to hide the fact that it is not an expert in everything to do with technology and so this shit is clearly not real, so i must stop allowing my mind to fuck with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be an expert with regards to the internet for sometime, where its a fear that I developed in childhood that the world of technology is overtaking everything and that we must know everything about it or be destroyed by it. I realise that while it is true that we must learn about technology, the internet, websites etc, doing so from a  starting point of fear is not acceptable, because within fear there is rushing, there is misalignment, there is self--interest, there is no care. I realise that I cannot trick any area of my own learning, I only learn at the speed of my natural learning ability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto a fear from childhood that if I do not try to learn everything about AI, the internet, technology and tell everyone else to do the same, then we will all be made obsolete -  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being obsolete, to fear being an outdated model, to always want to present myself as the "latest model" that I'm always up to date, in complete separation from the physical, because in reality there is only this one body that I am, I have flaws, I am an expert in some things and not others just like everyone else, and that is ok.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a bad person every time I speak about some element of the world of the internet, websites and technology that I'm deceiving myself and others that I am an expert in. Yet I continue to do it anyway to maintain this illusion and to get the energy of "oh he knows what hes talking about on the internet" from other people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the energy of holding, magnetising and gravitating peoples attention with such "profound statements" about the internet and websites and technology and the future etc, completely uncaring about if am actually an exert in the point im making or not, but still always speaking as if am an expert - if its online I know it apparently. I realise taht this addiction does not support me in living what is best for all life, it only taints my learning of anything, messes with my so I must take self-responsibility to stop this now, so that I can be clear about what I know and what I do not know, what is learnt to the muscle and what is not. 

I commit myself to not allowing myself  to speak with authority about anything to do with technology unless it is actually something I have direct memory access to the knowledge about and full

understanding of application with no holes. So as and when I see my mind reacting to a topic or question about technology, I must check myself immediately, I stop and breathe, I do not allow myself to participate with these thoughts, continue to breathe and only speak when I am clear, where there is no taint of the ambiguous, exaggerating, deceptive pre-programmed mind - I continue to breathe until there is no more thoughts that come up to pretend to be a master in something I am not.

I commit myself to living the realisation that I do not assist myself or anyone else in anyway by pretending to be a master in something that i am still learning, I realise that I am only equal to that which I truly know, therefore I can only assist myself and other people to reach our utmost potential if my knowledge within what I am speaking about is solid.

I commit myself to allowing myself to be vulnerable, to not expect myself to know everything about technology and then judging myself if I don't, or feeling embarrassed if don't at least pretend to know even when i don't - I realise that within getting comfortable not knowing something about web design, AI and technology in general, I build my humility and ability to build my knowledge step by step, from a starting point of self-honesty instead of fear.   

Day 246: Is it down to the Muscle?

How effectively did you learn something? I mean really is it down to the muscle? Am I actually an expert in this new topic in my life - whenever I learn something new after a period of understanding the terms, meanings and contexts of the new information, I always ask myself and want to test whether or not I have learnt the new information effectively.

If I have, then the knowledge has fully integrated into as my physical make up, where no thoughts are needed to access and utilise what I have learnt. Because it now flows naturally, this means that I have now developed the muscle memory, where it is now stored for a life time so to speak and within this I can then express myself as that physical movement to the truest extent of enjoyment, creativity and accuracy.

But If I have not learnt new information down to the muscle, then its interesting looking at the pre-programmed mind and how tricky it is, how much our ego naturally wants to know, believes it knows and in certain scenarios will even deceive our self and others around us that we actually do know before we have actually walked the necessary steps to actually be a master of the field.

I caught my mind doing this recently, where my paths crossed with someone who I have known since childhood, yet we have not seen each other for years.

We discussed what we have both been doing since we last saw each other, what new things we have learnt and the skills we have built from that learning - we both seem to have masses of skills and undertakings many of which we are masters at.

Yet as with everyone else in the world there are things we are not masters in, but are rather in the process of learning, walking the path to becoming masters in.

But at one point I mentioned my skill at building websites, which while it is something I have learnt a lot about in recent years, I am by no means an expert in the field - yet its fascinating that my mind wanted to present it to this person that I am an expert, and with regards to building websites specifically I have caught my mind doing this a few times.

Immediately I can see that because I have some notoriety online, because i make money from the internet and because i have learnt so much from the internet -

All of this is achieved via websites of course, so its like my mind has defined itself according to the internet, according to websites keeping me in separation from physical reality where the reality is that I am no different to anyone else.

We are all equal as life, and I will not accept myself attempting to deceive myself or anyone else that I am something I am not, so this attempting to present myself as a

master of the internet, as some authority while I am still learning myself is simply a mind fuck which does not support me in living what is best for all life -

When one is a padawan learner in anything, one must always accept that in all areas of our lives, that we cannot just be a master in anything because or ego says so, there is no cheat like in computer games, because we have to actually build the muscle to become the master of anything. 

So I'm looking here at why is this happening? When is this happening? What is it about building websites and the internet that I want to present myself as an expert in before I have walked the necessary steps to be so? Where did I first learn this concept?

These are all questions I must investigate further, and then will myself to change what does not make sense, so join me in my next blog as I continue this point.