Private number reactions

So today i noticed a pattern that i have seen before but never paid attention to releasing the point, and as with any point if it is not faced and released then it will only compound interest. So i had a call from a private number today, and when i looked at my phone and saw that it was private number, i didnt answer it, and i will only answer private calls 50% of the time, if i remember a bill i have forgotten, because companies sometimes mask their number, or just as a point of interest as to hear who it is. Although i can see that i usually always wait for the other person to speak first if i do answer a private call, out of a fear of me being exposed before the other person in dishonesty. But if i know i have paid all my bills for the month, then i rarely answer a private call number, because i know that the caller is clearly trying to hide who they are, and is not standing equal with me by being open and honest to speak as their own birth name as who they are. And therefore the person is clearly trying to deceive and avoid accountability for what they will say, just like when people use fake names online to build up bravery to attack people in secret which is totally unacceptable.

however i did react to seeing the word private number on my phone screen, with alot of thoughts and a definite slight jolt of anxiety around my solar plexus and stomach area, which for a moment passed throughout my body. I allowed an assumption, fear based thoughts that the person calling me was going to be someone from my past, looking to cause abuse to me and cause trouble. I have recieved threats to be beaten up and death threats on the phone before, so i assumed it could be something along these lines so i didnt answer. However when the phone stopped ringing i started going into a spider web of thoughts about who it could be, was it this person? was it that person? How did they get my number? What if they are going round my house while im at work causing trouble? Have i missed a bill from some company? All thoughts connected to fear. So i realized i was spiralling into thoughts, so i stopped applied self forgiveness outloud and breathed bringing myself back here. Then after i became stable again, i realized that i allow myself to react this way very often, when i see a private call on my phone, especially if i know i have paid all the bills. So as i am self aware of this pattern, i realize this requires correction through continuous application, me taking self responsibility on the point until here no further, so that private calls on my mobile will not effect me in anyway whatsoever.

Its just me allowing myself to react within thought to private callers, and participate with and hold onto memories, and connect fears to these which is just me separating myself from myself here as life in total dishonesty, which is just me allowing myself to compromise my stability as breathe, and thus not best for everbody.

And then on the drive home after doing a review with a team member, i recieved another call from a private number, i breathed and didnt react by allowing those previous thoughts i spoke of. I just breathed and answered the phone, anyway turns out it was one of my work colleagues who has a number mask on their home phone number, and she told me it was her that rang earlier also to ask for sometravel expenses. So this was cool because this only confirmed that assumption is never valid as reality, and that when i reacted and went into various thoughts and ideas about something, that it is only me separating myself from what is actually here as reality - this is just one practical example of how we can expose belief, assumption, anxiety and fear as the mind to be absolute bullshit. So no need to allow these kinds of thought reactions again separating myself from me as life, so i stand here taking self responsibility as the directive principle of life to release this point utterly from existance.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react to a private caller on my phone by going into the mind as thoughts, assumptions, beliefs about who it could be, and what they could want.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect these thoughts, to a fear based on past memories, which i allowed to generate anxiety within me, thus accepting myself to exist as limitation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto and connect memories as the mind to a private caller on the phone.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wait in silence for the other person to answer first if i do answer a private call, which stems from a fear of me being exposed before the other person, which is me allowing separation to exist as myself here as the mind, instead of standing as the direcive principle of equality and oneness and just speak if i answer, reagrdless of if im first or secind to speak, which is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from what i experience here within a private caller on my mobile, by going into the mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to limit myself within "hope" that my assumption hopefully will be wrong, because of an accepted fear that it could be someone who wants to harm me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hope within and as the mind as separation that my opinion of who it could be must be correct, totally unaware that if i cannot test this opinion here in this moment, practically in self honesty, then it is not valid, and thus is not real and is therefore of limitation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to separation as "having to" react in these kinds of ways in relation to private caller.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as separation within people calling my number on private number.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not immediatley realize that an assumption is never valid as reality in any moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that an assumption as the mind, only becomes valid as reality once it has been practically tried and tested here in the physical.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to percieve in my mind in total separation from myself here as life as breathe, that i can possibly know anything to be true without practically testing it first.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not stand fully, everytime within and as self trust while answering private calls.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have any reactions whatsoever come up in relation to private calls.