In my last journey to life blog I spoke about how I have re-programmed
myself to enjoy labour; however I have still found brainwashing present when I am
doing labour so I will open this up now. So I’ve always found that right and
wrong doesn’t actually exist really, in the context of decision making, because
really it is just a valued judgment I’m making which shows the limitation of
myself as the mind.
However I’ve noticed about myself sometimes that whenever I
miscalculate something ,then I don’t
like being corrected by someone else which shows my existence as ego looking
for validation of being “right” even when reality is showing me that I’m very clearly missing fact.
And I’ve noticed that whenever I miscalculate something, it’s
usually because I’m too busy in my head, believing that my opinionated
perspective of a calculation is correct, that my projection of events in my
head is correct without having complete 100% certainty of something, completely
taking into consideration the physical factors of how something is created
effectively - for instance I burnt the
dinner because I was too busy believing that my opinion of the correct
timeframe to cook the dinner was accurate, when in fact I was completely
incorrect, and if I had just followed the instructions to the tee 100% as a
common sense decision, then the burning of the food wouldn’t of happened.
Knowledge without application is useless. So knowing how to cook a particular meal
in my head is irrelevant unless I can physically manifest the knowledge I have
accumulated in my head through my hands.
So not being physically here point by point within any
labour I do causes massive devastation such as my food being burnt. Then when
someone points out to me that I have miscalculated a point, then sometimes I
will react internally as being offended depending on how much value I had in my
opinionated calculation.
And this offence of being corrected when someone else points
out my miscalculation, I have found is usually when someone has pointed out my ineffective
calculation at doing something which is socially defined as being manly such as
difficult physical labour, I experience uncomfortable annoyance whenever
someone points out that I’m not doing the point of hard labour correctly. And I
also experience this offence whenever I’m doing something socially defined as
skilful with hands such as cooking for instance, and then someone points out that
I’m miscalculating the cooking.
This experience of internal offence sometimes
will be obvious in my physical movements and verbal responses, however other
times I will suppress this offended experience depending on who It is that is
correcting me – whoever I respect in my mind I will suppress any annoyance that
comes up when the person corrects me, someone I don’t respect I will
immediately engage into a disagreement with through arguing and defending my
calculation, which is fascinating because it shows that I’m not seeing and
treating al beings equally.
I realize there should be no suppression or explosion of annoyance
at being corrected by any one, I realize that this suppression and explosion I do
around different people according to respect levels is actually showing my limitation
as ego, and is actually showing that I am not respecting the person fully as
myself as life, because if I did then there would be no reaction at all, just
taking on board the point the person is making without taking offence, so I
realize i must release any annoyance at being corrected by another through
effective self-corrective application, i realize that i do miscalculate and that anybody no matter what my opinion of the person is can support me to be more effective in a particular area because no opinion is valid as real.
So I can see this not admitting I’ve miscalculated point has
manifested over and over so many times
in my life, and I can see this is complete limitation of myself which must be
stopped, because i realize that to miscalculate something is actually
supportive because it reveals where I must investigate and correct myself,
where I have not taken into consideration every physical point to be fully
effective in my calculation based on 100% common sense fact rather than opinionated
self-deceptive decisions. And if someone else is pointing out my miscalculation
I must breathe and not allow myself to be offended no matter what it is that is
being pointed out, because I realize that it is very assisting for me to be
able to apply knowledge more effectively with my hands here in common sense
rather than creating opinions out of knowledge I’ve accumulated thinking I know
everything when I do not. Also I realize that it makes no difference who points
out that I have miscalculated, all humans are completely equal so my experience
in relation to every human must be equal.
Self-Forgiveness/Self-Corrective Living commitments follow
in my next blog……
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