So for the past 3 days i have been doing longer shifts at work, from 9.30am - 8pm which will contiune for the next 10 days where i have been training and directing my team and new staff at a show to explain our company product and how to collect leads as effectiveley as possible at the largest home improvements show in the country called the Ideal Home Show in London. There is tens of thousands of the upper middle and rich class of people buying expensive new technology for their homes, everything is expensive at this show, so alot more talking then usual is required, specifically about solar panels, pitching techniques, government tarrifs, numbers and percentages - and within this i have been allowing myself to react and to get affected by the show.
but anyway i have noticed a point since starting the show of where im allowing myself to just carelessly go into polarity as the mind, where i start watching people who are looking at and buying expensive items then i start getting back chat coming foward of judgemental, blaming thoughts about people with alot of money - "this money system is fucked" "how can we humans allow ourselves to busy ourselves with this consumerist nightmare, while life suffers" "rich and poor is so unacceptable" "i do not want to be here at this show" "oh wow another expensive item has been created and accepted at the expense of a starving person" these thoughts i notice are connected to pictures in my mind of war ravaged starving children and slaughtered animals.
So over the course of the day i see how i have been allowing and accepting myself to accumilate separation from the physical actuality of what is here by going into the mind and defining this home improvement show as a "negative" "wrong" and "bad" point.
And i have found already that as i go past my usual finish time of 5.30pm, and i have been talking alot more then usual in a day, i start experiencing myself as very tired feeling extremely heavy and then thoughts start coming up of - "i cant wait to finish" which i then start consciously participating in which because of self creation of a point of waiting for the "final whistle" at work so i can go and do "what i want to do" which obviously i define as "good" whatever energy point i want to participate in within and as the mind believing myself to be "re charging" only to experience the exact same point of mind bullshit and rising tiredness the next day.
Then when i finish work i go home or to a hotel, where after finishing company emails, some light exrecises, eating, 2 hours or so of tv, reading and research i just fall asleep. I have found two of the past three nights i have fallen asleep with the computer on my lap, where i wake up at around 4am turn off the computer then go to bed, and as i say i have been experiencing the same unstable back chat in relation to expensive items and rising tiredness the next day.
So fascinating that without these judgemental thoughts and definitions and pictures in my head, without the perception of the show and expensive things as "bad", of wanting to go and do what i want to do to "charge up" as "good" then i am not allowing the polarity point to play out, and thus tiredness and heaviness will not manifest, because i am not feeding into it, into the system of the mind of haves and have nots where nothing is real.
So its all me creating, manifesting and perpetuating this within and as the mind, building uneccessary mental relationships, carrying this extra weight as thoughts, pictures and energy, so it is me that must simply stop by taking self responsibility to equate and correct the point within and as breathe, so that i can remain stable in relation to this expensive show, instead of going into the mind about it manifesting energetic consequence, which only separates myself from what is here, debilitating and limiting me in being able to do what needs to be done as effectively as possible to the benefit of all - so that must be stopped.
but anyway i have noticed a point since starting the show of where im allowing myself to just carelessly go into polarity as the mind, where i start watching people who are looking at and buying expensive items then i start getting back chat coming foward of judgemental, blaming thoughts about people with alot of money - "this money system is fucked" "how can we humans allow ourselves to busy ourselves with this consumerist nightmare, while life suffers" "rich and poor is so unacceptable" "i do not want to be here at this show" "oh wow another expensive item has been created and accepted at the expense of a starving person" these thoughts i notice are connected to pictures in my mind of war ravaged starving children and slaughtered animals.
So over the course of the day i see how i have been allowing and accepting myself to accumilate separation from the physical actuality of what is here by going into the mind and defining this home improvement show as a "negative" "wrong" and "bad" point.
And i have found already that as i go past my usual finish time of 5.30pm, and i have been talking alot more then usual in a day, i start experiencing myself as very tired feeling extremely heavy and then thoughts start coming up of - "i cant wait to finish" which i then start consciously participating in which because of self creation of a point of waiting for the "final whistle" at work so i can go and do "what i want to do" which obviously i define as "good" whatever energy point i want to participate in within and as the mind believing myself to be "re charging" only to experience the exact same point of mind bullshit and rising tiredness the next day.
Then when i finish work i go home or to a hotel, where after finishing company emails, some light exrecises, eating, 2 hours or so of tv, reading and research i just fall asleep. I have found two of the past three nights i have fallen asleep with the computer on my lap, where i wake up at around 4am turn off the computer then go to bed, and as i say i have been experiencing the same unstable back chat in relation to expensive items and rising tiredness the next day.
So fascinating that without these judgemental thoughts and definitions and pictures in my head, without the perception of the show and expensive things as "bad", of wanting to go and do what i want to do to "charge up" as "good" then i am not allowing the polarity point to play out, and thus tiredness and heaviness will not manifest, because i am not feeding into it, into the system of the mind of haves and have nots where nothing is real.
So its all me creating, manifesting and perpetuating this within and as the mind, building uneccessary mental relationships, carrying this extra weight as thoughts, pictures and energy, so it is me that must simply stop by taking self responsibility to equate and correct the point within and as breathe, so that i can remain stable in relation to this expensive show, instead of going into the mind about it manifesting energetic consequence, which only separates myself from what is here, debilitating and limiting me in being able to do what needs to be done as effectively as possible to the benefit of all - so that must be stopped.
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