Muscle Communication feedback - Hayfever

So in SRA 2 lesson 1 of ITD, I am looking at the point of muscle communication, which I have not had any practical experience with, but being as I am on the farm as the point comes up in my assignment material, it is very supportive to work with people like Andrea who have over 8 years’ experience working with communication with substance through the physical body. So this evening during my muscle communication lesson with Andrea, I explained to her that I had a pain in my left wrist, so I established communication with substance through the Brachioradialis muscle in my arm. And the feedback received from substance was fascinating - because it wasn’t actually the point of me typing/writing a lot the night before that caused the discomfort in my wrist as I thought it was. Substance communicated that it was actually the point that I was blogging about that caused this reaction which was the point of hay fever. Now hay fever as with any allergy, indicates a point inside myself that I have not yet resolved which manifests itself physically as hay fever. Allergies can sometimes be passed on from family members, but I do not have any family members that have hay fever, so this is definitely a point of separation existing within myself.

So I continued with assistance from Andrea to go further into the point through simple yes/no lock/unlock questions, and also keeping my arm in lock position establishing an indicator/change as the muscle unlocks in relation to specific words indicating what I require to have a look at. Through the various feedback that I was receiving, It was eventually established that in relation to my hay fever was the word Mettlesome, and that when I was 6 years old, something happened, where I was with other kids my age, in a setting that was not in my house (From my own testing of muscle communication in relation to this point this feeling of being Mettlesome was in a playground at school, where I interfered with another kid, and a fight broke out, where a I broke something the other kid had, and a teacher shouted at me – then I experienced being mettlesome, anxiety and self-judgement). So I was expressing myself as kids do, and something got broken, and I then experienced myself as Mettlesome, and Anxiety and Self-judgment in relation to that, as the adult shouted at me, experiencing a “clogged up” tenseness of my physical-  and from that point whenever I experienced myself unconsciously as Mettlesome or as this anxiety and self-judgement, with clogged up tense experience inside myself, then my nose would become clogged up and I would experience myself as having hay fever, although in my mind, I would blame an outer point for why I’m experiencing this hay fever.

However as with any point, layers have built up through the years to enforce my self-definition as having hay fever. And also what came up from the feedback from substance, was that in relation to hay fever was also the word Unusual, and that there was a family point, and my sons mother – me an Andrea both found this fascinating, because earlier I had explained to her how my sons mother views me as unusual because of my participation with Desteni.  So, this is showing me that I allow my sons mother (family) to make me feel unusual, which is definitely true, and that from that I start experiencing myself as clogged up and angry, which manifests itself as hay fever, where I have clogged up nasal passages, and judge myself and get angry at myself each time I sneeze. But this point also works in all scenarios, so whenever I am around a family person (say a Desteni member) that I am judging in my mind as Unusual, or I perceive is judging me as unusual, or believing that I am being mettlesome, then again this clogged up of my nasal passages happens, and then I start sneezing, and experiencing heavy breathing. I have been judging myself as unusual to all the other destonians on the farm for having hay fever, and for being the only person from England, blaming the hay on the farm, getting angry at myself and the hay with each blow. Also the routine of the farm life here is not completely, but is  very different to my daily routine back in England, so again im judging the farm life here as unusual in my unconscious mind, then I start judging myself for that, which manifests itself as the hayfever, and again get angry at myself and the farm life with every blow of my nose.

So this feedback is fascinating, and in no way does this mean I can now start rolling around in hay lol, because this hayfever clearly took years to build up, and so will take years to walk out, but I am willing to do so, and I know it is possible to redesign myself, because I do not accept limitation of myself as acceptable, I accept no less then Self-Honesty as Equality and Oneness here, and muscle communication is such a cool practical tool to communicate with substance to uncover any unconscious point of the mind so that one can start applying self forgiveness on the points and releasing ourselves from the control of systems which is of separation- So I Breathe