So I was watching an episode of madmen the other day, and
the main character had a tooth problem that developed in the
episode. Then when people kept asking if he’s ok and maybe he should go to the
doctor, he kept refusing and denying that anything was wrong, telling everyone
that “I will get better” as if miraculously the pain in his tooth would just go
away, when physically the tooth was getting worse and worse to the point where
he couldn’t even bend down without flinching in pain from his tooth.
And it was only when the pain of his tooth was unbearable and
he realised it was getting worse not better as he tried to convince himself of
in his mind, it was only at this point that he actually decided to do anything
about the tooth by going to the dentist. So it was only after putting himself
through unnecessary suffering that he decided to do anything about it.
I found this fascinating, because I have a tooth problem at
the moment, and I have existed as this personality many times which is a part
of the male ego, where I deny that anything is wrong and simply refuse to show
any sign of weakness to anybody, presenting false strength to others, deceiving
myself into believing that I will get better by myself when in fact I require
some form of physical support to reduce the pain.
Fascinating within this also that when we look at peoples
perspectives about all the abuse here on earth, we humans have allowed
ourselves to be conditioned with a belief that “things will just get better and
magically work themselves out”. For example those that claims spiritual
divinity, actually believing that “the power of the mind” has the ability to
move the physical reality we all live in. As if we can just focus on a better
world magically manifesting in our minds, and then because we are thinking
about it, then apparently it will physically manifest, which is a state of
insanity.
Very clearly a state of insanity, because the world around
us is getting worse in every moment and will continue to do so, until we stop
bullshitting ourselves that things are getting better in our minds, when we
require immediate practical solutions to end abuse here on earth which start
within each and every one of us. Time to stop fucking around in our minds; it’s
time to get Self-Honest here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
exist as a concept that points of abuse in myself and in the world will
miraculously get better by using the “power of the mind”, when in actual fact
this is simply a way to distract myself from getting to the root cause of the problems
here and formulating/living real workable solutions that are of benefit to everyone.
I forgive myself that I have not realised that by believing
that I can “think myself better” when points of pain happen in my body, that I take
on this personality as myself in relation to all abuse on earth, believing that
I can think the world into harmony which is actually impossible.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
allow abuse inside myself and the world to get to an unnecessary critical point
of pain before I even consider implementing a physical solution that’s best for
all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mind has greater power to
move the physical then the physical itself which is dishonest self-deception
which anybody can test for themselves.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
only take action to correct physical pain in this world when the pain affects
me only, as a starting point of self-interest where I cannot even notice the
pain of others, but only the pain of myself believing myself to be separate
from others when in fact I am not.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
prolong the suffering that exists here on earth as myself unnecessarily through
existing as and feeding into pre-programmed consciousness which is abusive to
life and thus must end.
I forgive myself that I have not realised that I am equal
and one to all beings here in this physical reality, that my pain is not more
important than the pain of another, and within believing that it is I only feed
into my conditioning and the system of capitalism here to ensure that the abuse
of life continues on earth.
I forgive myself that I have not realised that I am equal to
all pain that exists in this reality, because in fact I am as life as all
beings as this physical reality, and it is within this realization that I empower
myself to take action to live what’s bets for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
exist within and as the male ego where i only focus on presenting strength to
others, when in fact this strength is not real and is only existing in my mind as
is proven when I experience real physical pain inside myself where this male
ego cracks and no matter how hard I try in my mind I cannot avoid the pain that’s
here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
fear being weak and to be judged by others around me as weak when they see me
in pain, because I am constantly in a state of competing with others in my mind
– not wanting to show weakness to the enemy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe
and fear that I am diminished in some way within openly showing people that I am
in pain, that I will be hurt by someone more if they know I’m in pain, when in
fact this concept is only existing in my mind and is thus not real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire
to exist as an unbreakable being at all times, without realising that I am
flesh and bone, so it is very clear that I can break, and that this picture in
my mind of me being an unbreakable being is just ego and an idea of myself in
my mind
which is clearly not real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to constantly
compete with others, only seeing people as opponents in a “mind war”, focusing
on winning so that I can be the “god” of this reality, instead of realising
that I require to work together with others to implement practical solutions so
that everyone can experience being “god” a world where no competition exists
which is an equal money system.
I forgive myself that I have not realised that my mind as
thoughts, feelings and emotions has no actual tangible power in anyway whatsoever
in this reality and that the only way to create any kind of harmony in this
world is through physical participation here in every breathe.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe
that I can correct real physical pain within and as a concept of spirituality,
where I allow an idea that the physical pain is not real, that by focusing on
bliss ascending to light in my mind I’m apparently making effective change that’s
best for all, when in fact this is self-deception because I’m actually hiding
from making real effective change that’s best for all.
I commit myself to not deceiving myself within the belief
that “things are getting better” in this reality when in fact what is physically
existing and accumulating on earth in every moment is more abuse, proving that
things are actually getting worse.
I commit myself to practically implementing workable
physical solutions to end abuse in every way in this reality. I only accept solutions
which are based in actual physical support that’s best for all.
I commit myself to not allowing any ideas, beliefs or perceptions
that my mind has some kind of power to correct real physical abuse in myself,
in my application or in the world as a whole, because I
have seen for myself
many times that my mind has no actual real tangible power in anyway.
I commit myself to implementing and living solutions to
create a system where everyone’s pain is removed which is best for all, rather than
not caring about life, focusing on removing my own pain as a starting point of self-interest,
which I do not accept. I do not allow myself to believe that my pain has more relevance
then anybody else’s, because I realise that all pain that exists in this world
is equal
as pain, and thus equally needs action to be removed.
I commit myself to not fear showing the physical pain I experience
to others, because I realise this fear is simply the male ego desiring to
present strength to others, so I realise that I am not diminished in any way
through being open about the pain I experience, I am simply being clear and
supporting myself to be able to correct the pain in real time here. As long as I
believe I can’t show my pain to others, where I hide pretending I’m string, then
I’m making sure that the pain is unnecessarily prolonged – so I do not allow
this.
I am only interested in self-honesty, I’m only interested in
a world where heaven is actualized with myself as the starting point because it
is best for all.
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