At work today there was a scheduled managers meeting at head office that my boss told me about on the phone. Its just a meeting to meet some new managers, and share our perspectives on how we find it practically managing our teams, which can be cool support but we dont have to go. Now at todays meeting there was two new managers introduced to people in the office, meanwhile i was 70 miles away, and when i heard on the phone that these new managers where at the meeting, then i immediately went into the mind as a thought that "i better go, because i dont want to be left out of the group or any major decisions" then a moment later on the motorway, i realized that i was going into this point, and that the only reason i was on the motorway was because of participating with this thought, so i applied self forgiveness outloud and stabilized myself within and as breathe.
Then when i got there it turned out that the meeting was actually cancelled at the last minute due to training new staff. But i found it interesting to note that i was only there in the first place because i initially participated in a thought that "i dont want to be left out of the group or any major decisions" not because i wanted to support myself or another within the job, but purely from a fear perspective of fearing being left out of the group. I then stopped and applied forgiveness again, and realised this thought "i dont want to be left out" is coming from a fear of not being able to participate in the group, a fear of being cast out by the group, a fear of not knowing what direction the group is going to go, thus using the group as a crutch for my own short comings based in fear, instead of appying myself within the goup according to whats best for all. So no matter what group i find myself within, i am solely responsible for myself, and i must be standing in absolute self honesty within my starting point of participating with a group.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create and perpetuate a fear of being left of of the group.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from what i experience here in self awareness by going into the mind as a fear of being left out.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to trust myself here fully in each moment self honestly, because it is within self trust that my actions are trustworthy as best for all.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into the ego, wanting and believing that i should be involved in all managerial decisions, which is separation of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as separation as the fight to survive within the group instead of whats best for all.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to face and correct this point as soon as it comes up, because i realise and accept that within compounding and participating with a thought even for one moment, then the consequence of that one moment of thought must occur.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to realise and accept that in all moments i am reponsible for myself fully, that if the group is no more then i still remain here as breathe, so to go into my pre programmed mind about my work group is totally unacceptable.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as having to constantly proove my worth within my work collegaues existing as a constant state of competition.
Then when i got there it turned out that the meeting was actually cancelled at the last minute due to training new staff. But i found it interesting to note that i was only there in the first place because i initially participated in a thought that "i dont want to be left out of the group or any major decisions" not because i wanted to support myself or another within the job, but purely from a fear perspective of fearing being left out of the group. I then stopped and applied forgiveness again, and realised this thought "i dont want to be left out" is coming from a fear of not being able to participate in the group, a fear of being cast out by the group, a fear of not knowing what direction the group is going to go, thus using the group as a crutch for my own short comings based in fear, instead of appying myself within the goup according to whats best for all. So no matter what group i find myself within, i am solely responsible for myself, and i must be standing in absolute self honesty within my starting point of participating with a group.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create and perpetuate a fear of being left of of the group.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from what i experience here in self awareness by going into the mind as a fear of being left out.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to trust myself here fully in each moment self honestly, because it is within self trust that my actions are trustworthy as best for all.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into the ego, wanting and believing that i should be involved in all managerial decisions, which is separation of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as separation as the fight to survive within the group instead of whats best for all.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to face and correct this point as soon as it comes up, because i realise and accept that within compounding and participating with a thought even for one moment, then the consequence of that one moment of thought must occur.
I forgive myself that i have not allowed myself to realise and accept that in all moments i am reponsible for myself fully, that if the group is no more then i still remain here as breathe, so to go into my pre programmed mind about my work group is totally unacceptable.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as having to constantly proove my worth within my work collegaues existing as a constant state of competition.
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