Day 398: Disregarding the small things

Interesting how the mind always focuses and reacts to all the points we define as the "big important" things, yet when it comes to what we define as "small issues" we ignore, disregard and don't see the point in "wasting our time" with small things. Its actually pretty fucked up and explains why so much chaos exists when humanity is busy with its own selfish "big things" to deal with.

Since I first started walking my process, I have developed an advanced understanding/realization and a living of the reality that all life matters, no matter how small - and that no matter how small the issue may seem to my pre-programmed mind, I pay attention to the small shifts my mind makes throughout the days.

It's that location of the origin of my own brainwashing, everything is in reverse so as an example while everyone can acknowledge that Cancer is a serious medical issue, the Cancer itself is the large consequential outflow of what started as one tiny cancer cell in the body, but was ignored or not located in time before the large consequence came through. Or a single small rain drop in a pond makes big ripples, same principle.

We are pre-programmed to want the big money, the best sex, the biggest houses, just the biggest and best of everything, which explains how so many animals, plants and humans suffer in silence everyday, because they are considered small/far away points.

I still catch my mind trying to avoid/ignore/disregard the small from time to time, which really highlights how much this fascination with size is so deeply written into me. For example when I loaded up my TT the other day, I went to work on one of my custom word lists which was a very large complex crypto word list.

But just before loading up TT I was reading some quotes from the Hagakure and one from Master Ittei stood out to me "Matters of great concern should be treated lightly, matters of small concern should be treated seriously".

Then halfway through my complex crypto word list, I stopped and started laughing at myself, because i could see how the quote from Master Ittei has often been manifesting when I use my TechnoTutor as a pattern, where I have this back chat come up of "well I know all the early level 1,2,3 word lists, I should mainly focus on my complex custom word lists"

So as a result I spend a lot of time on custom word lists which is cool, but I often disregard the seemingly "small" early word lists which is not cool because even the most complex amazing house, house strong foundations. 

So too we must have a solid foundation of our living of words, this means that all our early vocabulary that has been fucked up with emotional polarities through the years, is actually the most important to be clear on.

I could see my mind trying to avoid going back over the basic word lists, with thoughts coming up like "I'm so above these lower lists" - again I laughed, then I took a deep breathe and moved myself to go back right to the beginning of going back through the alphabet that is so seemingly "small" and that I apparently "know so well". What did I find? The same thing I usually find when I do not disregard the small - profound insights.

The letter G as an example, what does it mean to you? The schooling system we were brought up in taught us that the letter G is simply the 7th letter of the roman alphabet and many kids do not even understand that our alphabet is roman.

But when you explore the letter G further you will find so many other fascinating definitions such as - a unit of information equal to 1000 megabytes in computer programming, one of the four nucleotides used in building DNA, relating to a unit of force equal to the force exerted by gravity or G-force, the cardinal number  that is the product of 10 and 100 - also in the Esoteric realms of Freemasonry, you may notice the classic square and compass with a letter G in the middle, which stands for Freemasons viewing the universe as being a result of the noblest of sciences, the Geometry of God so to speak.

Can you see how so much meaning comes from this apparently one "insignificant" letter? Can you see how when someone is able to live all dimensions of a letter/word that stability, consistency and opportunity is more likely to emerge? When I am clear on the definition of a letter/word, then I am more effective in defining and living the word according to whats best for all.

I remember when I was a child playing with Marbles and I would always value the larger marbles and when my grandfather first explained the planets in the solar system to me around the same time, I found the planets bigger then Earth like Jupiter and Saturn to be "more interesting" based on their size.

Now I walk this self-forgiveness to ensure this pattern is not maintained - 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in any moment disregard consideration of something my mind defines as small, without realizing that when I disregard the small things then those small things can accumulate into big problems as we see with something like cancer. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define some things as having more importance then others based on how big it is, or how big my mind defines it, which is an illusion of the mind and thus not real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that it is through the accumulation of 1+1+1 , focus on the small points joining forces, eventually becomes big change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise in every here breathe that we are all pre-programmed to value size and large amounts of energy so much, without considering that the reason so many people suffer in the world is due to so many humans only looking for the biggest energy in self-interest without any care of whats best for all life such as animals, plants and our fellow man.  

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that everything is in reverse, so actually it is paying attention to all things large or small that is best foe all and I see how big issues rarely happen in one go, it is usually a seemingly small issue which develops into a large chaotic one through ignorance to the small issue which is unacceptable. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the bigger and more complex the word list then the "better for me" it is creating a polarity that does not support me to live whats best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the bigger the vehicle is then the better it is, when this is not true all cars are cars.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be physically bigger, to have a bigger house, to have more money etc in complete separation of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that I have been holding onto memories as a child of Marbles and Planets with my grandfather, where I thought the best Marbles/Planets were the biggest ones - so I see how holding onto these memories does not support me in living what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that it is only through paying attention to the small details, that creates a huge masterpiece in the end.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that when it comes to vocabulary, my mind has an idea of itself as being intellectual and thus gravitates to complex words/subjects etc, but often will disregard the seemingly small things that I "obviously know" but when I went through the G meanings it was clear I do not have direct memory access to all the definitions of G.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise in every here breathe that walking is always needed before running which is the case for all things - the basics must be mastered first before anything else.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify reacting to things that "seem big" when in reality stability as this breath is needed with all things large or small, so there is never a justification to react that exists, yet if we focus on aligning the small things to whats best, then the big things will follow suit. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realise that all forms of abuse, started as just one "small thought" which then because of not being dealt with accumulated into a big problem later.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to react negatively towards anything my mind defines as "trivial" so as and when thoughts come up, I stop and breathe and continue to do so until there is no more thoughts that exist.

I commit myself to living the realization that big or small things I must be stable, and it is through attention to the small points that the biggest beneficial impacts are made in my mind/beingness/living and in the world as a whole.