Day 381: The Thing to Connect me in

Desire and Consumerism are fascinating aren't they, this idea that buying things gets us acceptance to someone, something, some group. I have been looking closely at this point recently, because while I have always had a pretty disciplined mind through walking my process in relation to common sense spending. However, I have been having more thoughts come up around consumerism as business has been particularly good over the past few months so justifying thoughts to spend can creep in.

This is why I have as an example always had a problem with Christmas, because so many people around the world are being self-dishonest and dishonest generally throughout Christmas. Where people tend to buy other people things for one of a few things - show "love" for a person, to "get closer" to the person, or maybe even use the persons gratitude at receiving a present against them later on a few months after Christmas etc.

That idea that you tell someone you love them, get them a really expensive present, seemingly to get closer to them, but in reality you are doing it just so then they are in your pocket and you can manifest your real desire later on which is to try and emotionally manipulate the other person to do something nice meaning expensive back for you now. That is really are fucked up nasty stuff.

Of course true gratitude and to build a connection with anyone, any group any thing is never going to be based on buying items, it will be a self-movement based on supporting that person unconditionally.

I have been working with grounding myself when these moments come up for example, as I have been exposing more people then ever to TechnoTutor and Desteni during this lock down, I have been networking all over the place as I see how the message of Technotuor and Desteni is more needed in the world then ever before. So the real desire here is to share the message of equality and oneness with as many people/groups so we can all learn and grow from this virus. Ok cool.

But then over the past week I joined a gaming community however, in my mind it then starts like encrypting the original desires, transmuting them into something else that makes no sense - where in my head im like "yeah I should buy a cool t-shirt from the website now, i see some cool looking ones, I want one and it probably will bolster my acceptance in the group straight away. yeah"

Its like this vehicle of connection, a thing I "need to buy" to "connect me further" that the pre-programmed consumerist mind believes it needs to achieve its goals. The goal here is to get close to everyone and share the message of equality and oneness in a group. As I was about to pay for a t shirt I stopped and laughed seeing what was happening in my mind, seeing how I am not aware and going into dreams, seeing how the ego tries to rationalise buying something outside of ourselves, as a means to try and get a closer connection inside ourselves to something else lol.

Its not like I'm saying buying things is bad or anything, its just that in this example for instance, whether I buy a product or not is never going to be a measure of my effective interaction with a group, that will always be the result of fully immersing myself in the group, moving myself into creating enjoyment, satisfaction as myself, not on short burst energy spurts from buying things for a false connection. Sure if I actually need to buy something to access something else then ok, or when getting something will support us to expand ourselves, then obviously it should be bought.

 I will continue to monitor and unravel my mind around buying things because it often shows me something I have missed at first and must face/correct.