Day 320: Stability within travelling and God the creator

Everything in this world is created, I participate in the creation of the world as it exists, through the creation of myself as the relationships I allow between all that is here as words. I am the god of words so to speak, the god of this world - I see how the image and likeness of my words reflect to me that I have disregarded my responsibility of giving to life as I would like to receive it.

I see how I have not in every moment accepted my responsibility as god in the creation of what is best for all life through my words - but instead have created words that form and maintain relationships of abuse, harming those less fortunate than me.

I see, realise and understand how I have believed that I can create whatever I want in the name of free choice without direct consequence, believing I am special from this power to create, when I have abused this in my vanity in the creation of myself and the creation of the relationships which produce the image and likeness of this world.

I take responsibility for myself to end the image and likeness of  this world as it exists, I will end this creation of backward meanings I have assigned to words  - I have the power to create the living word as flesh and this must be honoured and respected as my power to produce what is best for all life.

Travelling is an interesting word that I have been unravelling and redefining in my process -

I see how the idea I have allowed myself to be as my ego wants holiday travel only, travel for the energy of what feels good for me in self-interest as the mind consiconses system not travel to accomplish the creation and development of a relationship that is beneficial for all life.

This is what I have been investigating and removing from my existence, my reactions in relation to travel - where whenever my mind would react as negative thoughts to travelling some distance, whether it is 1 mile or 1000 miles, I would forgive myself immediately of that reaction and stick to breathing where I could see clearly with common sense - If the result of this travelling could develop a connection, a creation, a consequence that is best for all life, then it does not matter how far I must go the travel will be worth it.

So I have created stability within and as the point of travelling long distances over this past few years in my life - yet I have seen that there are still moments where my mind tries to fuck with me - when I for instance am stuck in traffic, when I am being delayed to complete this travel, thoughts will come up again like - what am I doing? This travelling feels like too much effort, this travel is not fun enough right now.

I see how this world as it exists as ourselves as this capilistic money system - has programmed us all to have the starting point of self-interest when it comes to travel, where the attaining a higher energy in self interest is the focal point - I want the sun, I want sex, alcohol, drugs, I want the best views, the most memorable experience, I want to forget my life more then I usually would, I want to avoid responsibility for this world as it exists.

I see how there is fear about losing money when it comes to travel - where my mind will not care when I am spending money going on holiday as this self-interested "my fun" above all else. Yet when I am travelling from the starting point of producing what is best for all life, then my mind will have thoughts coming up that this is a "stupid waste of money".

I will not allow this as myself to control me - 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire travel where my fun in self-interest is the primary point and where I resist travel that is based in the creation of what is best for all life, as I have allowed myself to define this as work, as a "something I have to do".

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that what is best for all life in relation to travel is a point something "I have to do" as if it is a 9-5 job - when in reality any travel that results in what is best for all life is common sense, not a chore.

I f forgive myself that I have not allowed and accepted myself to see, realise and understand in all moments that whenever My mind is having thoughts coming up doubting and getting annoyed at the travel I am doing, that shows me that the travel I am doing is valid in its basis of creating what's best for all life, because the ego as the idea of myself I have been programmed as through the years since childhood into young adulthood will only doubt and get annoyed at any travel that is being defined as work and not fun.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear travelling a long distance to get my time wasted by a person  - when in reality this is just my ego trying to defend itself, trying to justify and direct me to avoid any travel that is made from the starting point of what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear wasting money travelling a long distance when in self-honesty any travel that is based in the creation of what's best for al life, is never a waste of money, but any travel based in self-interest as the idea of myself in complete separation from physical reality is the only wasted travel that exists.

I forgive myself for only recently being self-honest, investigating and correcting the pattern my mind has been trapping me as in relation to travel -  I see, realise and understand that If  I had been taking responsibility much earlier in my life, not procrastinated, then my travelling in this world would have produced far more outcomes of support already.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be pre-programmed growing up in this world, where I have created a polarity as myself as this world system, whereby any travel made from the starting of my own self-interest is positive and thus worth the time - whereas travel that is based on what's best for all, which as this idea of myself I have defined as "hard work" is negative and so apparently not worth the time, which is fucked up.

I forgive myself for not realising in every heree moment of breathe that this is no good or bad in anything, there is only support or abuse and that actually everything is in complete reverse - so it is the travel we make in self-interest as this idea of ourselves having a  right to our fun before all life is included, it is this which is abuse and any travel based in building what is best for all life is a starting point of support in relation to travel.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the word travel here, through creating meanings,  an image and likeness of this word which reflects that I have disregarded my responsibility of giving to life as I would like to receive it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility to living what is bets for all life as the god of words, through creating words, meanings that maintain the relationships of abuse in this world as me, which I can never accept to continue.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have the "free choice" to create words as whatever I want with no consequence, when in reality when I am honest with myself, I have abused this power to create the living word as flesh, through this vanity  -which has produced the consequence of  the image and likeness of the chaos of myself and the reflection of this chaos in the world globally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to taint the words of my creation, by creating words with backward meanings that do not stand for life, but instead stand for that which works in opposition to life which is evil - So I end this no matter what.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to participate with any negative thoughts that come up in relation to travelling, I realise that the only reason these thoughts are coming up is because my ego is trying to defend itself, inserting fear based thoughts, because the travel I am making is based on what's best for all life which the ego will always try to manipulate me out of - so as and when I see these thoughts come up, I stop and breathe, I do not allow myself to participate, I just breathe and continue to do so, where I can apply common sense and can then stick to what's best for all life, I continue to breathe until there is no more thoughts that come up at any point during my travel.

I commit myself to not allowing myself to participate with any positive thoughts that come up in relation to travelling, I realise that these positive thoughts are again just being produced by my pre-programmed ego and show me that the travel I am doing is questionable and likely is based in self-interest, because my mind is not resisting but is encouraging me to do this kind of travel  - so as and when I see my mind having positive thoughts come up around travel, I stop and breathe, I do not allow myself to interact with these thoughts as I know that in doing so will only keep me limited as a pattern of separation -  I continue to breathe, apply common sense, look closer at the travel I am making - is the starting point clear in what's best for all? If not I stop this travel, I  continue to breathe until I am stable here.

I commit myself to living the realisation that my pre-programmed mind as the idea of myself that I have allowed myself to be will always try to resist that which is best and will encourage that which is not best. I realise that this will continue to occur until my living as what is best for all life has been repeated, integrated and actualised so many times that it becomes who I am as my nature with no influence from the pre-programmed patterns of abuse.

I commit myself to continuing to push myself to travel to wherever my mind does not want to go to, to go to any lengths necessary to bring forth that which is best for all life.

I commit myself to dedicate myself to purify my words as the creator, the god of words, so that they can represent life as what is best for all life, which will thus represent me as life, understanding that within my creation, when I see life everywhere as my creation then I know I have create dme as life.

I commit myself to living the realisation that I can never be more than the words I accept myself to be, which is the reflection as this world in every way.